Seeing Things Through Different Glasses

I got new glasses today.  I haven't gotten new glasses since about 2000 - that's a lot of adjusting these eyes have got to do in the next few days.  I am only wearing them for an hour or so at a time so I don't get a headache from the eye strain.  Vegging out at the computer isn't helping much, I suppose.

I've realized lately that my life isn't as much about the things that are happening as it is the way that I'm looking at those things.  Attitude has become my new mountain to climb, and I haven't even laced up my hikers.

Let's start with marriage.  Ben and I just celebrated our five year anniversary in July.  When we got married, we said we'd spend our five year anniversary in Antigua.  Instead, we dropped off our sweet 15 month old into the care of my parents while we dined at the Melting Pot.  Not quite the Caribbean escape we had planned, but it was celebratory nonetheless.  Ben and I never used to argue or snip at each other.  It was actually kind of disgusting how well we got along and connected with each other.  I could sometimes catch a friend or two puking into the corner as we laughed and giggled and flirted with each other endlessly.  Now that we're parents, it ain't so easy.  Time together is short.  We snip often.  I wonder sometimes what happened to that amazing connection we used to have.  Since I've never gotten this far into a marriage before, I'm realizing this is simply the changing of the tide, and we must adapt.  My mind says, "Freak out!  Something has gone terribly wrong!  No longer are you the couple you used to be!"  And my heart says, "Look into his eyes.  Remember the love.  Watch him play and laugh with Amelia.  Feel his gaze rest on you when you aren't looking.  He is and will always be THE ONE."  I think I should listen to my heart.

School is about to start.  Last year was not so great.  Great personally for me, yes.  I am proud of the teacher I have become, although I still have a long way to go.  It was no so great professionally in ways I can't really explain.   When I think about starting back, although I am excited to get back into my classroom, my stomach turns to knots.  I will be praying incessantly for peace and wisdom, and the ability to shut my mouth.  More importantly, I need to not care so much about little things that ignite my angry fire.  I may not be able to change certain situations, but I can change my attitude and my outlook.

Our house.   Is still.  For sale.  It hasn't been quite a month, but not a looker have we had.  We don't want to lose money, but we've come to the realization that we must lower our price if we want to get out of here in this crap economy.  We won't be purchasing our dream home by far, but three bedrooms, a two car garage, a basement, and a yard would be nice.  If we are still here at Christmas, it's up to me and my attitude to be grateful and not the Grinch.

We are tightening our purse strings, once again.  A few years ago, we read Dave Ramsey's The Total Money Makeover.  We paid of our credit cards, never to be used again, and started our Debt Snowball.  We even started to take Financial Peace at our church, and then the stork arrived.  Since then, we have slacked off in a major way, although we have kept the credit cards from creeping back in.  It's time to get serious again, though.  No more needless trips, outfits, activities, etc.  Oh boy, will I be tested.  Especially because where I work ain't exactly home to the "have-not's", if you know what I am saying.  But we have a plan for our future, and we have to be strong.  My heart needs a money makeover in order for our family to have one.   80% behavior, 20% head knowledge, says Dave.  We must!  We must!  We must increase our....financial responsibility.

So I've got my work cut out for me in the attitude department in the way that I view life.  Hopefully, like these new glasses, I will make the needed adjustments.  Otherwise, bring on the Tylenol.

HOLLA -